Wednesday, March 8, 2017

Humanity of The Human Heart ~Through Dying I Had Life

As a small child, I can remember my first encounter with this terrible disease called cancer.  Although, I did not understand why my Aunt was going through pain, I was told she had cancer.  One day she was with us and the next I was at this funeral home reaching down to give her my last kiss.  The experience was so cold and I will never forget that day.  Time past and then another Aunt passed, which experienced the same pain.  Through dying I had life.

When I was diagnosed six years ago, with breast cancer, I was reminded of the experiences that I endured in the past.  All my family members had surgery, chemo and radiation and still died.  Why would I choose this way, I did not want to go through all this suffering?  I wanted to live a quality of life, even if it meant a year or two.  Maybe I was a coward, but why would anyone today put themselves through all that pain and suffering. Through dying I had life.

Going back, this disease hit even closer to home.  I remember the first-time cancer affected me, it was one day in school.  I made 2nd honors and was very proud, until my teacher handed out report cards.  She called everyone’s name, until it came to mine.  Sherry, sorry I cannot give you your report card for your father has not paid your tuition.  Not understanding this I was able to call my mom and I still can picture this in my mind, I cried and told her they would not give me my report card.  That day she came down to find out why.  My father always paid in the beginning of the month, but cancer struck and tuition was something that was not first on my parent’s mind.  Happy to say, I finely got my report card, but was embarrassed in class because of cancer. Through dying I had life.

For about three years I watched my father go through surgery, chemo and radiation.  The suffering was unbearable, no child should have to experience a parent slowly die. Through dying I had life.

On my sixteenth birthday, my father was being operated on his brain.  I can still picture going to see him the day after and him and my mom gave me my birthday gift together.  This was a family tradition, a sweet sixteen ring.  My last gift from my father before he passed away.  My birthday was in January and he left us in September. Through dying I had life.

It’s still all a blur to me. This affected me and my family in so many ways.  When I was in high school, the tuition was too much for my mother to pay the total amount for three children.  In order to complete my school years with my friends, I had to work around the school for half of the tuition.  During this time of my life it was very difficult, for how to explain to my friends not only the cancer that my father was enduring, but how it was affecting his mind. Through dying I had life.

You see, the cancer went to his brain, which changed his personality.  He thought he was someone else.  I had to search within myself for I was raised Catholic and when my father thought he could change the world by rewriting the bible, picking up hitchhikers, and buying land to build his church.  This was too much for our family to take, so how would my friends understand.  At this time, I lost friends for they did not know how to handle what I was going through.  The pain of what my father was going through was more than cancer, it destroyed him. My father passed on September 16th on my younger sister’s 8th birthday. Through dying I had life.

After living through high school, a year later, I lost two more Uncles to this terrible disease.  Years later I met Dan my husband and it seemed all the pain that I experienced went away.  We became a family with a daughter, enjoying life and not thinking of the past.  Then it hit again, my mother in law was diagnosed with cancer.  The memories came back for watching my mother in law go through the same procedures which led to death. Through dying I had life.

This time I was the mother and had to explain the death to my four-year-old daughter.  I did not want her to have the same experience that I went through, so I explained the death like sleeping beauty with all the flowers that surrounded her.  That Christmas, my mother in law had saved money up for her grand kids.  She had passed away on September, the same day the 16th on a Monday as my father did seventeen years ago, that Christmas she knew my daughter wanted a doll house.  Christmas day there was a doll house under the tree.  We explained that Grandma delivered it from Heaven. Through dying I had life.

Since then I have lost cousins, Aunts, Uncles from cancer doing surgery, chemo and radiation. Through dying I had life.

Coming back to me and when I was diagnosed with cancer, why would I go through more pain and suffering.  It did not work for them and the quality of life that they endured was unbearable.  This is why Dan and I explored the possibility of other methods that were not so invasive.  We found it and I have lived longer and healthier than others that had cancer in my family. I learned that first you have to do a life change for there was a reason why I was struck with cancer. Through dying I had life.

Again, two years later from when I was diagnosed with cancer Dan my husband was told he had prostate cancer.  We did not have to think, we know what our decision would be.  He went for the same treatments as I did. Through dying I had life.

Today, we are healthy and have managed our cancer without surgery, chemo or radiation.  Dan and I are so humble that we broke the cycle and learned other methods to treat cancer without the conventional way that killed our family member’s.  This is why I am so passionate on educating others on the methods we used.  The suffering and pain that I endured by seeing and watching my family members suffer and ending up in death somehow has given me life. Through dying I had life.

The memories of my father, mother-in-law, Aunts, Uncles, cousins, friends will not be forgotten.  The death of millions every year can change with research and knowledge of other methods. We need to make a change - Humanity of The Human Heart.  Please check out my web site

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